“You Are Your Rituals”

Hi Vicky, 

Thanks for this post. I like the idea, but i’m not convinced what we become is so determined by our internal life/rituals. There are a lot of things that shape us that are beyond our control – or perhaps even God’s? (Try having kids – that’ll shape you more than anything else!). I too am studying (only a mere MA :)) and used to be in music… but for me, the 6 month deal through Sony never quite made it… but what if it had? More seriously, a theology / philosophy like the one you suggest needs to work for victims of all kinds too, and if it doesn’t work for them, then i’d say it doesn’t work. That’s the way i have tried to develop my own ideas anyway – rather than them being situation specific for me in the UK. Know what i mean?  

Still, your third question is the one for me at the moment. With small children and the loss of energy, internal life and time that comes with that, there are things I say, or voices that I replay as a ritual in response to situations that now need to change. Just need to find the energy…!

thanks, 

Laul

I think it’s important to have rituals, for example, my mourning routine: if I don’t get up, then shower, then have breakfast, then use my study notes, it takes me twice as long to get ready because I enter a pre-programmed half-asleep mode of preparing for the day, then I’m awake by the time I get to the bible bit. If I mix up the order or wake up late it throws me!

However it’s important to recognise habits that detract from anything proactive. I’m usually in the habit of getting home from work and goin straight on the laptopand doing nothing much. It’s good to break the habit and do something different now and then.

Documenting my time has become a significant ritual for me. It’s all mine.

I’m limited in what I can achieve by health and circumstance. On a daily basis it’s easy to let time fly by without having achieved any task satisfactorily.

The last half decade has been a challenge. Time is provoking me to do something with it – unfortunately, the awkward events which have taken place in my biography have happened to me during a life stage in which there is no-one with whom to share them. I don’t have a husband or children, for example, and it’s difficult to justify keeping on keeping on when there are no relationships to show proof of perseverence or blessedness.

What I can do is limited by decisions of others I am not in control of.

In the UK we often think of labour and production as being indices of success. For me this relationship has been reversed. I’ve been challenged to maintain my relationship with Jesus during this era, when I haven’t been able to quantify my value to him, or to his Church; or to society in any meaningful way. There’s nothing to show. Instead, I have been qualified.

I haven’t had many experiences to tell of. My sensory world is confined almost entirely to my own room. My thoughts and mental processes are the primary input into my emotional life. I could count my daily utterances on the fingers of one or two hands.

Calculation has helped me to work out how much time I spend doing one task or another. And to map the methods I am using to try and take control of my future past: to take every thought captive.

Goals need compliance to resonate and I’m not swimming in positive attitudes currently; more like treading water.

Wow, I feel very moved by this, very moved. You’ll be in my prayers for sure, maybe we can find you some arm bands :)

I was just contemplating writing another article! (Without anywhere to submit it though, I have started doing bits for http://www.godculture.co.uk but my latest article is still being reviewed, so another for them would be impractical) That sounds absolutely fab! (By the way the site looks great! Good presentation is key and you’ve certainly managed it!) Going to have a look around and think of something to write about, then I’ll give you an email :) Thank you!